Parador de Hondarribia

We were traveling as a group, which is part of the picture. The building is interesting and the location is good, with a lovely terrace view toward Hendaye. The nearby airport barely gets used, so it wasn't a problem. Still, don't count on getting a drink on the terrace. The place is supposedly four-star, but there's no restaurant, the bar shuts at 10 pm, and breakfast is basic. The rooms are fine but not large. They switch off the air conditioning in autumn, though there's a big ceiling fan. Service was the main issue. Reception were great, and some staff were friendly and clearly tried, but a notable minority seemed unwilling to serve guests. The short woman with white hair stood out. On two mornings, I didn't get the two breakfast items I'd ordered, and the plate was thrown onto the table. The bar staff served us, but looked as if they hated every minute of it. I remembered that Paradores are government owned, so perhaps staff are civil servants who can't be fired even when they're terrible at their jobs.

Our junior suite with the "mirador" had an amazing view of the bay. It's the only room with part of the room made into a glass balcony. The stay felt like a real splurge, but worth it. The staff were welcoming and professional, and escorted us up to the third floor. The room was quiet, secluded, clean, and stocked with an espresso maker, electric kettle, coffee pods, assorted teas, and bottled water. Breakfast was an amazing buffet in an elegant dining room with lovely scenery.

The breakfast was top notch, and the staff made us feel like royalty, minus the medieval taxes. My long-time partner in crime, who happens to be my wife, and I spent the weekend sipping wine in a fortress where knights once plotted. The stone walls and all the history made it feel like time travel, with modern comfort. Views over the bay take your breath away, and the atmosphere is so authentic you half expect a medieval council to turn up at breakfast. For romance wrapped in history, this is the address.

Reader, I'm not from this town, and I don't know anyone at the hotel. But let me tell you, this place is a FORT. Stone, like a castle, and hundreds of years old. They keep it in great shape, the service is top notch, and the staff are super cool. If you're not cool, you'll like France better, so drive on. There are tunnels, apparently, but we weren't allowed in because they're dangerous and full of poison gas and stuff. I think this is like their Alamo, where lots of Spaniards died fighting the French and Germans, so show some respect. Back in the 1920s, the Queen of Spain saw the fort had fallen into disrepair and got the town mayor to fix it. He did. Big shout out to Mrs. Nora and Mr. Mikel, both pros. We'll be back. The Carlos V cafe is cool too, and run by pros. Try every cake they've got. Their cowboy coffee, US-style black coffee, is good too. They call it an americano, and they have proper cream and sugar. Breakfast is very good and fancy, but in a chill, good way. Thanks to the breakfast people for letting us sit down and hooking us up with coffee before checkout. Mrs. Nora, thanks for helping get us a car to the airport. The driver was on time and cool, and the car was clean. Shout out to housekeeping too, they're dialed in. The girls at the coffee shop on the plaza across from the hotel make great ham and cheese sandwiches and tapas pintxos too. Everything cool is centered around this hotel. Spend the money there, it's worth it. When we come back, we're staying there. Good luck, reader.