Kaim Park

I was here for a year, during 2000-2001, when I believe it housed all the homeless people from West Lothian. Most people were sound, about 99%, and generally nobody bothered me. Most of the staff were friendly and courteous, though, as usual, there was the odd one who acted as if they were above everyone. It looked like a rubbish job, to be fair. I was lucky to get the room above the bar. The first two nights were unbearable, then COVID lockdown began and it went quiet. The WiFi in the bar downstairs was top quality. Greggs occasionally filled our boots with pies and cakes, which was actually pretty good, and the maids came every day. I don’t know what state it’s in now. It used to be a major wedding and function venue, and I hope it’s managed to regain some of its former glory. Good luck, guys, and thanks for having me for a year :)

I haven’t eaten in the restaurant for years, though I haven’t heard any negative feedback about the food. It’s open to the public and part of the main hotel. I went to the Coach Inn Bar for a few relaxing pints and some pool instead. The welcome was good, the staff were very friendly, and the beer was nice and cold. There’s a pool table, jukebox, bandit and quiz machine, and they show live sports too.

For £80 a night for a double, this place is seriously overpriced. It’s old and shabby: the toilet didn’t flush properly, the windows didn’t lock properly, and there’s no WiFi. Apart from breakfast, there’s no food or drink on site. Apparently that stopped 18 months ago, though signs still point to a beer garden and bar. It feels like it’s sliding toward being sold for apartments. Maybe it was good 30 or more years ago, but I’d avoid it.

We booked our work Christmas night out months ahead, but the event was badly organised. They’d been told on three separate occasions that one person in our party was vegan, yet there was no vegan option, so they ended up with no dinner while everyone else had three courses. It was embarrassing. I eventually got a refund, but only after a mortifying back-and-forth where the hotel blamed the outside caterer and the catering company blamed the hotel. We’d booked a 90s night, but the DJ didn’t know that until we complained and the manager asked him to play 90s music. The company made it a good night, but the venue, organisation and lack of vegan food were a big letdown.