Courtyard by Marriott London Heathrow Airport

It’s handy for an overnight stop between flights, and the staff were friendly and welcoming. The breakfast had a decent spread, but it was very greasy. The rest was far from four-star quality. The carpet in our room was filthy, and the bed felt like it had more springs than sponge. I understand room service can be expensive, but the food should’ve been better for what we paid. I’d walk to the McDonald’s down the road instead. One night was more than enough for me, and I won’t be rushing back.

The room was perfectly adequate if you’re of average size. I’m not a small man, and somehow the twin beds and I just didn’t work together. It felt like trying to park an SUV in a space marked “compact.” The staff, though, were genuinely lovely, friendly and sympathetic, and clearly practiced at giving the “we’re so sorry about the shuttle” look. The Courtyard Marriott Heathrow Airport shuttle is a magnificent, possibly legendary vehicle. Like Loch Ness or Bigfoot, I never actually saw it, though people swear it exists. The only reason a sensible person books an airport hotel is to get to the airport for that 5am flight, rather than sleep on a luggage carousel. The shuttle is the product. Everything else is just carpeting. So there we stood with our bags and hope, like a dog waiting at the kennel for an owner who isn’t coming back. One star. Fix the shuttle, and at least discount our stay by the cost of a taxi.

There’s a bar and restaurant on the top floor. The rooms are quiet, and we couldn’t hear any plane noise. It’s also conveniently close to LHR, but there’s no free shuttle. Getting to and from the airport means taking a cab or an overcrowded bus. Being a Titanium member brought zero extra value: no free breakfast, food or drink vouchers, lounge access, or room upgrade.

We chose this hotel because our son loves watching planes, and Room 510 didn’t disappoint. It’s a premium room, really well appointed, with epic views of planes landing and taking off on the runway. The rooftop bars and restaurants made the stay even better, and PKs India was delicious. I highly recommend it. The staff were amazing too. The only issue was the EV chargers, which nobody could connect to. They arranged for us to use the chargers at the other Marriott, so it all worked out.