The Zetter Townhouse Clerkenwell

I’m still lying awake, angry about how this was handled. I’m based in the Netherlands, and for some reason my card often needs the PIN inserted. The staff had told me that would be fine. After a nice dinner in Soho, I arrived with my friend and was met by staff who were aggressive and cold. They announced loudly in front of a full room that my card had no balance and I had to pay another way immediately. It was rude, embarrassing for my friend, and handled badly. If I’d been alone, I would have left for another hotel. I did pay, but no one admitted there’d been an error or apologised. Instead, they kept asking why I hadn’t used the payment link they emailed while I was out on Good Friday. I suggested they could have called since they had my number, but they dismissed that. The hotel itself is nice, though the lift lighting is terrible. If they want to live up to what they advertise, the staff need better training.

I hope this saves someone else from a bad experience. We paid £800 a night for the hotel’s nicest room for the weekend we got married, but a beautiful room can’t make up for poor service. Management hasn’t replied to my email, which makes it seem like they don’t care about improving. Check-in was the worst I’ve experienced. We waited ten minutes in the bar without an update, then staff asked for payment upfront and read out the amount to everyone in the room, including my wife-to-be. We were sent to the first floor, where three identical white doors had no labels. The things we’d requested through their “pre-check in” form weren’t in the room, and the ironing board was broken when it arrived. Only one of the junior bar staff seemed to think any of this was a problem. A couple who got back just before us later that evening seemed to be raising their own issues with management, so it may not have been isolated to us. Flowers and champagne were brought to our room the next day, which we appreciated, but the damage was done and nobody spoke to us directly about what had happened. I wouldn’t risk booking here for a particularly special occasion.

Their bar, The Parlour, is excellent and clearly popular with locals. The bartenders know their stuff, and it’s best to reserve a table ahead of time. The breakfast menu is very good too, with excellent streaky bacon for the Yanks. The hotel is in a great spot off the main road, so our room was quiet.

Getting here from St Pancras on the Eurostar was wonderfully convenient. The staff were exceptionally warm and friendly, the service was impeccable, and the bedding was superb. Breakfast cost more, but it was undeniably delicious. We had a delightful stay at The Zetter Clerkenwell. The charming atmosphere, tasteful décor and fireplace made the place feel enchanting. Our room was cosy yet spacious for London, with a lovely outlook over a quiet little square and a great night’s sleep. The bathroom heating wasn’t working and the ventilation seemed limited, though everything else was spot on.