White Birch Inn

We left within five minutes of checking in. The building felt worn down, and although the room was clean, it was dated and had old bleach marks on the carpet. It reminded me of staying at my grandma's house. We picked it because there was supposed to be a bar and restaurant attached, so we wouldn't need to drive, but after we arrived we learned both were closed. That wasn't mentioned on the website, Facebook, or elsewhere, and we were told to use Uber to get food. We asked the owner to contact us about a refund. After many calls and several weeks, I got an email saying a refund wasn't warranted.

I was satisfied with what we paid, though there are nicer and more expensive hotels nearby. I judged it as an older inn rather than comparing it with a bigger chain like HG. The entrance confused us at first: it's at the back center of the building and seems to be the pub entrance, but it's both. Our wicker room was quiet, the queen bed was okay, and it was clean enough unless you checked the corners too closely. The faucet was hard to turn on and then came on full force, soaking several pieces of my clothing. WiFi didn't reach our room. Customer service and public relations badly need work, so bring a sense of humor or you may be offended.

My room was completely trashed when I got there. I went back to report it, and the rude woman insisted it had been cleaned until she checked her computer and saw it hadn't. While I waited in the hall, she offered me a beer, but I just wanted to go to bed. Someone also asked if I needed to use the drawers, then told me they were broken and would take longer to fix than I would want to wait. Staff were gone in the mornings before I left and had left by the time I returned in the evenings. Checking in was unpleasant too. An older man in the office asked what I wanted, and when I said I was checking in, he irritably told me the bartender could help. The only other room with its door open had a "section closed" sign, but I found the bartender there anyway, and she told me what I owed. I thought I'd prepaid because their email said they'd charge the full stay. A woman doing paperwork at the bar rudely interrupted to say they had no partnership with hotels.com or priceline.com. I hadn't booked through them, but I wasn't about to engage more than I had to. Rude staff, poor service, and cheap in the worst way. You don't want to stay here.

The rooms were clean, which earns the five stars, but don't expect modern furnishings. It looks like it hasn't been updated since the mid 1980s, and the WiFi was spotty when I tried streaming. The Sturgeon Bay location is okay, though Fish Town and places farther north are over 30 minutes away. It has some charm and may be haunted, so ask about Stan. It serves its purpose as a place for a good bed and bath in popular Door County.