Bayplay Cottage And Portsea Apartments

The owner even gave us a challenge for the weekend: leave the house cleaner and tidier than when we arrived, despite not providing a vacuum. We had to ask the tenants downstairs to borrow one. It’s a funny little prank, apparently, and made the weekend so much more fun. The neighbours and owners were also determined to keep things quiet. We were interrupted while talking outside at 10 PM, even though the noise restrictions allow it until 11 PM on Friday and Saturday. Great service if you want silence all the time. The place is large and spacious for groups, near Portsea Hotel, but very expensive. It has the perks of a World War 2 bunker: black mould in the showers, ripped and stained carpets, scuffed walls and ceilings, and damp, musty smells. Rustic chic that really earns the high-end price. Next time you want a luxury weekend away with your group, this is the place.

We’ve stayed at these apartments a few times over the years and have always had good service. They’re basic but good value, and make for a nice getaway. The beach, Portsea Hotel, pier, and Point Nepean Park are all close by, with Sorrento up the road for supplies. Check-in is easy, and staff leave you to enjoy your holiday while staying available if you need them.

The house was dirty when we arrived, still being cleaned at the 4 PM check-in, and smelled strongly of White King. The carpet was filthy. There were no empty bins, even though staff said they’d empty them, and none were changed. New bins came Saturday afternoon already half full, so we spent $90 taking rubbish to the tip. A dead rodent smell in the backyard made one side unusable, and we couldn’t leave the windows open at night because it was so bad. The kitchen was covered in ants, and the fridge leaked onto the floor, making it hard to use. We were charged $400 for a few minor stains and linen hire. We were also told to bring our own pillows and doonas, though the booking document clearly says they’re provided. Not the cleanest place. It’ll do if you need a big venue for a bucks night, hens, or footy trip.

Great customer service, and it was easy to hire anything we needed. There’s an apartment to stay in, toilets, outdoor showers, and heaps of equipment. We went sea kayaking on our own despite never having done it before. It was really easy, and we didn’t even get wet.