House U Hovorků Vlkov

Fine.

There’s room for six cars in the yard, and the cottage works well for a group of 10-11. The building is old but decently equipped, with a newly renovated bathroom downstairs. The kitchen has an electric stove, microwave, convection oven, kettle, coffee maker, toaster, fridge and sink, plus plenty of dishes. If you bring your own keg and tap, remember to bring pint glasses too.

The owner has working cameras in the yard and seemed to come by almost every day to check whether the geraniums had been watered, or to water them. It was odd to suddenly have someone in the yard who didn’t belong there. There were labels and stickers on most things explaining what you should or shouldn’t do, along with possible fines for not following the instructions. I can understand that previous visitors may have caused problems, but it felt like too much. The cottage seems to be an attempt at old-fashioned charm, though I didn’t find it romantic. The kitchen felt tiny for 12 people, and there was one usable medium-sized fridge. The other was a non-working 50-year-old unit that seemed meant to take the place of a storage cabinet. A strange experience for me. Never again.

Vlkov is a beautiful location, to be fair. The property, though, has old equipment that didn’t work properly, and we’ve had better facilities everywhere else on our yearly trips. The owners have been incomparable too. We arrived as three families with children and immediately got a lecture about what wasn’t allowed in the cottage or garden. Signs all over the property listed the rules and fines. At the end, the owner said we’d received four sets of keys, one for each family plus one extra, and kept 1000 CZK instead of returning it. Check anything you sign carefully, and bring enough money for deposits on everything. Just being honest.