Les Hauts de Porto Vecchio

The cottages could use an update, but they were clean and had everything we needed. Just keep in mind they’re reached by stairs. We enjoyed staying among the trees with that magnificent view. The outdoor pool’s equipment looked a little worn, though it was fine for a quick dip.

We had a small house, perhaps because we booked for just one night. It felt like stepping back into the 1980s: the rooms and furniture were dated, and even the shower curtain was plastic. There was dust on the kitchen hood and the air conditioner. I absolutely wouldn’t recommend it.

We rented “La Cabane,” advertised as a “Luxury Cottage” with a private pool, not a “Villa.” By morning we were glad to leave, even though breakfast never arrived. We had ordered it at reception before seeing the room. When we raised our concerns, the man at reception, who we presumed was the owner, said his arthritis kept him from coming to inspect La Cabane. He seemed surprised by each problem and said it had been rented every day since March without a complaint. We did get another discount in the end. He said he’d already given me 30% off when I booked by phone for over €250, a price at which I never would have checked availability. He knew Booking.com listed it at €186. The “fair” price, he said, was payable in cash. Even at that price, this was unacceptable for a supposed 3-star hotel. The whole property is badly neglected. It must have been lovely once, and could be again with some care. We’d cut short our mountain trip hoping to spend a special late afternoon and evening by our little pool. Instead, when we arrived, we got a key and a big smile, then were told the patio door wouldn’t close. We left with only our clothes and toothbrush and took everything else to dinner. Stepping onto the terrace, we noticed the loose wooden railing and the loud crackling of a high-voltage line right overhead. That was accompanied by awful gurgling from the pool system. The water was at least 10 cm below its usual level, the skimmer wasn’t working, and there were leaves on top and debris at the bottom. Someone called a pool technician, who did come, but our late swim was gone. We left for dinner at 7 pm without getting in the water. The large shared pool, in mediocre condition, wasn’t what we’d come for. The private pool’s wooden deck is rotten in places, so watch your feet. One joist seemed close to collapsing, a concern if you’re overweight. A quick varnish job hadn’t fixed it. The little spotlights, which must once have been cute, were stained and no longer worked, nor did the pool’s porthole light. Other things were neglected too. The pool enclosure and BBQ were messy and dirty. Nature had grown over the gulf view, and I can’t blame nature, but what was the gardener doing? Inside, it was warm and humid. We needed help starting the air conditioning because the shut-off valve was broken. The unit made such a racket, like an old 1970s photocopier, that we couldn’t use it at night. The bathroom floor sloped oddly, and the parquet shown in some website photos had been replaced with gray linoleum like a bus floor. The shower mixer was in poor shape. I’d seen the same photo in a 2023 comment, so it hadn’t been replaced. The grout had been patched as carelessly as the patio varnish. The shower sloped too, and water that couldn’t get through the drain went through the grout instead. That may explain the damp all along the bottom of the bedroom wall. I’m not writing this to be malicious, just to help future guests avoid a major disappointment. The gentleman said the place had been booked every day since March with no complaints, what happy guests! Calling it a “Luxury Cottage” may be marketing, but the gap between that label and the reality was too much.

The breakfast basket is generous, with croissants, Nutella, chocolate cake and orange juice. I like the idea of leaving it for guests to enjoy on their own schedule. But there’s no savory option, pancakes, muffins or homemade cakes, and that brought the value down for me. They also provide just one bottle of semi-skimmed milk, so two people who both want milk are left taking a chance. Since this is a paid service and the milk is long-life, it seems easy enough to ask at check-in whether guests want regular, Ascorbic acid or soy milk, and whether both people drink it. Lots of people are vegan or can’t tolerate milk. It’s a romantic, relaxing place for anyone wanting independence in a natural setting. The houses are separate and nice, but small and basic for their size, and the finishes and upkeep aren’t especially good. The furniture and room layouts didn’t impress me.