Mythical Coast Wellness Retreat

I can’t see how this is rated five stars. Our stay was awful. In mid-January, staff said our room had been upgraded to one with a sea view, but it was very cold, the air conditioning didn’t work, and the toilet leaked water onto the floor after each use. We reported everything and were moved to another room, where the toilet had the same problem. Breakfast was very poor, and it looked like food from previous days was being reused. The hotel advertises a spa center open until 9:00 p.m., but when we arrived at 7:00 p.m. it had apparently closed at 5:00 p.m. We were offered a very small pool, about 5x5 meters, said to be 28°C. The water felt no warmer than 20°C. It was extremely disappointing and nowhere near what I’d expect from a five-star hotel.

We didn’t stay at the hotel, just went for the Sunday brunch buffet. It cost €15 per person and felt like a waste. Although the buffet was meant to run until 14:30, the bain maries had been switched off by 12:40, so the eggs, bacon, and other hot dishes were freezing cold. The buffet was also empty in places and wasn’t replenished, for example, there were no mushrooms. Unacceptable for a hotel of that standard.

I booked nearly a year ahead for a wedding on the island. The email communication before the trip was prompt and professional, so the stay itself was a real letdown. The hotel is quite remote, with no nearby shops or other dining options. To get to a convenience store or another restaurant, you need a taxi ride of at least 15 minutes. The room was clean, but very basic for a five-star place. There were only 4 hangers, and after I asked for more, they brought just 3 extra. The safe didn’t work and maintenance had to come several times, which took time and was frustrating. The TV remote also needed fixing. These things should have been working before check-in. At check-in, I had to follow up more than once to get the personal driver I’d arranged by email for several points of interest. The staff member seemed reluctant to help despite the clear email instructions. Pool towels were another hassle: the basket was empty several times, and the Pool Bar staff told me to go to reception to get some. Reception only agreed to send towels to the pool after I complained. Breakfast had a decent range, but the quality was average, and the other dining options were mediocre too. The hotel was clean and staff eventually dealt with some problems, but service, attention to detail, comfort, and food didn’t meet what I expected for the price or the five-star rating. I expected much more.

The booking for our five-night stay in July 2025 was smooth, with friendly and efficient replies. What followed was one of my most disappointing hotel stays. Service fell short from the moment we arrived. Food was poor, including dessert. Of the four desserts on the menu, staff told me to avoid two because they would “take too long.” I chose chocolate profiteroles, but got stale, empty pastry shells with chocolate fudge and ice cream, no filling. Staff hadn’t cleared the entree and main dishes before serving dessert. Breakfast was substandard too: food sat uncovered in warmers that weren’t working. A couple in our extended travel group ended up with food poisoning. When my son became ill, staff said the doctor “doesn’t make house calls on Saturdays” and that we’d have to wait until Sunday. We went into town to get medicine from a pharmacy, then found on our return that the medical centre was open Saturday. I expected better local knowledge and support from a five-star resort. There were basic room problems as well. The safe didn’t work; staff gave me a key because its batteries were flat, but the whole box could be picked up and carried off, and nobody tried to repair or secure it. There were only 3 hangers for two people. I asked for an iron and got one without an ironing board. I was told, “We don’t have one,” but after I got visibly frustrated because I needed to prepare clothes for a wedding, an ironing board suddenly appeared. Cleanliness was poor. The toilet had a “disinfected” tag, yet there was hair on the seat and more on the floor. The room itself was below standard, sometimes not cleaned until after 6pm, and once the cleaner chose not to clean it at all. Checkout was another struggle. Staff were disorganized and gave me receipts that were unsigned or belonged to someone else. My taxi waited over 10 minutes while they tried to sort it out. I finally had to leave to avoid missing my flight and settle the bill online afterward.