Hofbrau Riverfront Hotel

Every inch of the room was filthy, and the photos online could not be farther from reality. We had a nice river room, they said. I took photos of the bathroom, which was disgusting. The tub was so gross I wouldn't wash an animal in it. The floor clearly hadn't been cleaned in ages; dirt, hair and who knows what else was packed along the edges. The toilet paper dispenser was falling out of the wall, partly hanging in the hole. The portable AC was wedged high above the sink with a towel, and you had to climb onto the counter to reach it. I didn't walk around without shoes, slept in my clothes and put nothing on the floor. The door didn't lock properly, which felt completely unsafe. The wooden stairs and balconies were uneven, unsafe and hazardous. There's zero excuse for dirty, smelly, uncleaned rooms when the whole point is to give people somewhere to sleep. I have no idea how they can still be open. Do not stay here.

I asked the manager for the owner's number, and he texted the owner, but nobody ever called back. We paid $300 a night, $605 total, for this awful hotel, and the town report rated it at 95. They must be blind or paid off. We checked in around 1 pm and, against my better judgment, thought we could rough it for two days. I was wrong. A sign said the fireplace in our room was out of order. When I asked to move to one where it worked, the manager said none of the fireplaces had worked in the last 5 years. Then they should cover them so the cold air doesn't come in. The floor in front of ours was rotted, with a piece of carpet over it. If I were a bigger person, I probably would have fallen through. The curtain was dirty and a mess, and the bed cover was disgusting on both sides. I used a couple of blankets I'd brought instead of sleeping under it. The bathroom was very outdated, the toilet wasn't bolted down, and the tub jets were missing, just holes. This place needs to be abolished.

Our room was so gross that the cleaner had to do it a second time before it met her standards. She still left bugs and hair on the floor. The AC didn't work and sounded like it was about to explode and take us down with it. Luckily we stayed chill and made the best of it. We'll laugh about this forever, but we don't recommend it.

I booked a last-minute trip without reading reviews and assumed a $200-a-night hotel would be at least decent. I should have known it would be bad when I saw the no-refund policy. This was the worst place I've ever stayed. It looked like it hadn't been cleaned since 1965. The rooms were dirty and moldy, the sheets were disgusting, and everything smelled like cigarettes. I woke in the middle of the night and decided to sleep in my car instead because it was so dirty. Please don't stay here. If zero stars were an option, that's what I'd give it.