HOTEL DON PEPE MALLORCA

The room wasn’t ready when we arrived at 4 p.m.: the floor was wet, it smelled bad, and there were suspicious marks on the walls. The bathroom glasses still had toothpaste on them throughout our stay and were never changed, the shampoo couldn’t be used, and there were lots of mold marks on the shower tiles. We could hear everything through the nonexistent soundproofing, including what the German neighbours said and their drunken return at 3 a.m. Reception was fine, but a €2.50 bottle of water from the minibar was the cherry on top. Really disappointing for a supposed three-star hotel.

This is a party hotel in a party area, and you can hear people coming back drunk at 3 a.m. because there’s very little sound insulation. I hadn’t known that El Arenal is Germany 2.0: everything is in German or Dutch, there are lots of German restaurants, and even people speak to you in German. If you want a Spanish experience, go somewhere else. When we arrived at 2 a.m., they said we had to leave our passports or IDs at reception and collect them in the morning. That felt odd and scary, and I’ve never had to do that at a hotel before. In the morning we had to sign the information from our passports, which also seemed odd since usually you sign a hotel contract or rules agreement. There were no towels in our room, so I had to ask for them. Our room had red stains all over the furniture and on a hanging picture; our friends’ fridge was leaking. They also charged €5 just to use the mini fridge, even if you weren’t consuming anything.

Never again. Our room had no balcony and looked onto an interior hallway, and the beds were uncomfortable. Drunk German teenagers made noise at night, so I can’t recommend the place. With these problems, the price should definitely be lower. Parking wasn’t included and cost €12 a day. There was a different room issue every day: no toilet paper, a sink that didn’t work, and no shower gel on the first day. We were so disappointed.

Being adults-only was a big plus for me. The location is about five minutes from the beach and far enough from the clubs. S'Arenal is known for groups of people partying, so the music from stag and hen groups, mainly German and British, at 5 a.m. after a long flight was frustrating but not a surprise. The affordable price seems to attract disruptive groups. There’s a German supermarket opposite that closes at 9 p.m., and another local supermarket less than a minute away with drinks, snacks, and other essentials. We had a balcony, and the room was mostly clean, but the view of other buildings was nothing special. The beds were awful and springy, with every spring poking into my back when I lay down. The air conditioning didn’t get very cold, so we opened the bathroom and balcony windows for air. The bus stop for the old town, routes 25 or 23, is about a five-minute walk. The airport bus stop is a minute away behind the bins and costs €5. Bring cash or use the local top-up card, since contactless isn’t available. There are lots of restaurants within five minutes, from seafood places to juice bars and local tapas.