The Royal

At 5am, our electronic-code locked room door suddenly swung open and the light came on while we were asleep. A male voice said, 'sorry mate', then hurried down the corridor. I asked him to identify himself, but got no answer. My female partner was lying naked on top of the bed. This was totally unacceptable. We were there on a Caledonian mystery break. The room was adequate and the food basic. The apple crumble was uncooked and had no sugar added. I reported what happened to reception that morning. They apologised profusely and said the manager would call me, but so far I haven't heard anything.

The balcony/veranda was in a terrible state, with cigarette ends scattered around, sand on the floor, two chairs upside down, and a table with a hole in the middle. The ashtray also had cigarette ends in it. I reported it at reception and expected someone to clean it, but nothing was done over the next three days, despite me raising it morning and evening. Eventually I found manager Bob on duty, who said he'd deal with it, but still nothing happened. I booked a superior room with a balcony/veranda in September. The room was very cramped but reasonably clean, and the bathroom was a good size. The toiletries weren't as advertised. On my leaving day, after a lot of persuasion, the receptionist went to the office. The manager/director said I was getting £240 back, but said he was in a meeting and didn't have time. I left my details at reception. I've made six calls since and had no reply. RoYAL HOTEL, HONOR YOUR AGREEMENT.

We lasted 15 minutes in the rooms before leaving, and I'm grateful the receptionist gave us a refund. The online pictures were like 'catfish', showing a completely different hotel from what we found. It looked rundown, as if nobody gave a shit about the place, and the rooms were so disappointing. The big security fence panels around the grounds were a nice touch, I suppose. It may look like a cheap and cheerful stay in the photos, but it wasn't. Go somewhere else. I can't believe people giving it 4 and 5 star reviews are talking about the same hotel.

The food was the best thing about the hotel. Every meal was beyond expectations, 10 out of 10. I would have loved to meet the chef. The evening entertainment, held 2 to 3 nights a week, was really good too. The location is excellent for both the seaside and Skegness town. From the sea view side, take the first right, then turn left at the far side of the lake to get to the beach and all the seaside attractions. From the side with the fountain, a right turn takes you on a 10 minute walk to the main shopping street. Everything you need is around the clock tower roundabout. A couple of staff aren't very friendly, though the rest are lovely. The cleaners are getting better, and if you have an issue they come to your room to sort it. The hotel needs a good bottoming out in all areas. One day our room wasn't cleaned at all and there were no fresh towels. They'd only made the beds to make the room look good. We went in July and September, and we're booked for November for Turkey and tinsel week. See you soon. I'll add photos when my phone lets me.