Hotel Mónaco

This seems geared toward travelers stuck with a cancelled flight for a night or two. There were eight of us stranded by easyjet, who told us at the airport to sort it out ourselves online. Our next flight wasn't for two days. We got a taxi to the hotel that morning, but the receptionist said he couldn't check us in until 2pm. We left our suitcases and went into Faro. When we came back at 13.40, the reception and lounge were packed with people waiting, many of whom had been there for hours. At 2pm everyone queued, and somehow all the rooms were ready right on the dot. The man had spent much of the day watching people wait. Even basic hotels will sometimes give you a key before official check-in if the room is ready, but this unhelpful man wouldn't. Our room was clean, and we had a peaceful couple of nights, but the fully openable glass doors on the top floor had no balcony, just a very low railing up to hip height. That felt dangerous and unsuitable. I wouldn't advise staying with children or if you're planning to go drinking. Cleaners only came if you put a sign on the door asking for cleaning. They emptied the bins, cleaned the toilet, and made the bed, but didn't do the floor. There was no tea or coffee setup or fridge, just one small bottle of water for the two of us. Breakfast wasn't worth going down for. It was abysmal: the closest thing to a cooked breakfast was cold scrambled egg on toast, plus hotdogs from a tin floating in water. The so-called 4 star price was far too high. The woman working in the dining room, who had no teeth, seemed miserable and scruffy. The young girl at the bar and snack bar didn't seem to know what she was doing, and they served frozen pizza from the Aldi across the road. They ran out of cider the first night and still had none the next. There was no real beer, and the bar didn't open until 3.30pm. The pool area was dirty, with half of it cordoned off. The grass was overgrown and muddy, and I had to wipe mud off my feet before putting on my shoes. Dead flies and wasps floated in the dirty pool. This can't be called a 4 star hotel, and it was a rip-off for what we paid. With Uber you're okay, but otherwise taxi drivers seem to take advantage of unsuspecting tourists for a quick buck. I don't recommend it. The manager needs replacing or needs to start making changes.