The Stones Hotel

The location is nice, and the room was decent enough for sleeping, but the food and service were bad. We had problems with the room: the sockets didn’t work, one light flickered, and the TV controller was faulty. We asked for replacement batteries and got ones that seemed even older. The website says 24h room service, but when we tried to order, we were told it was closed. The food was overpriced and bad, and breakfast was unremarkable. After I was served a burned pizza, the chef was rude and complained. If you just need a decent room and sleep, it’s fine. For good food and service, go somewhere else.

We had our wedding at the hotel this weekend, with the ceremony and reception there and many guests staying too. I’ll always remember the effort, care and little touches that made our day absolutely perfect, including packing things up for us after the wedding. Sasha went far beyond her job description. She was on it from day one, organised, efficient, quick to reply, and never made anything feel like an issue. She’s the person to organise a wedding for you, and a lovely person as well. The entire team was perfect, polite, friendly and warm. Every question was answered and any issue was sorted quickly. Thank you again, Sasha, Joanna and the rest of the team. We’re so grateful and appreciate you all.

I checked in at 4pm and was told the hotel had run out of water from its bore hole, and to wait half an hour before using any. That’s not ideal when you need the loo, or when your room feels so hot it makes Saudi Arabia feel cold. There was no warning that water might be intermittent throughout the stay, despite what the hotel response implies. After dinner I used the toilet and went to wash my hands, but there was still no water. I went to reception for bottled water so I could wash them and spoke to four staff before getting a bottle. The restaurant was still serving food while staff couldn’t wash their hands, and the hotel was open while guests couldn’t wash theirs. There were warning signs during check-in. The receptionist asked for help over her walkie talkie and was ignored, while other staff rushed around. The room doors sound an alarm if left open for about 10 seconds, so you have to get inside quickly to avoid annoying neighbours. When you leave, the doors don’t lock like at most hotels. You have to swipe your room key again. The manager was shouting angrily at an older couple who wanted to order dinner at 8:20, even though the sign said the restaurant closed at 9pm. The hotel response said he spoke politely but loudly because it was noisy. I strongly disagree. The restaurant was nearly empty and not noisy. Is “Don't you walk away from me when I'm talking to you” respectful and polite? The woman walked past almost in tears. Readers can decide whether bellowing that at guests matches the hotel’s claim of being respectful and polite. The manager fobbed me off again about the bore hole and running out of water. I’ve stayed in all kinds of hotels, from 1 star to 5 star, across 5 different continents, and this was my first time with no water and an incredibly obnoxious manager. Having read more reviews, it seems this wasn’t the first time it had happened. I’ve heard from Wiltshire Environmental Health, and they’re going to investigate. If you want a shower, clean hands from the people serving food, and polite management, avoid The Stones Hotel. Fawlty Towers is alive and well in this shambles of a hotel.

The staff are friendly and the rooms are clean and perfectly acceptable, though for some reason there’s no toilet roll holder. Breakfast is good, but the hot buffet uses some cheaper ingredients. The first evening meal was excellent: ham hock and chicken terrine, then steak pie. The second dinner was a letdown after that. The starter order hadn’t gone through and arrived with the mains. I confirmed I still wanted it, then it appeared 30 seconds later, which confused me. It tasted okay, but wasn’t the shredded chicken I expected, more like deep fried chicken bites. That may be debatable, but Google agrees with me! The main was a burger and fries. The patty was good, but it wasn’t as described: I couldn’t taste burger relish or burger sauce, and the onion was a small, overly thick lump of red onion rather than what I’d expect, caramelised or minced. The fries were awful, bland, undercooked oven chips in looks and taste. Very disappointing compared with the high quality of the first night. A showed a colleague, who had also complained about the burger, and said theirs wasn’t as bad as mine!