The Monte Carlo

The place was hard to get into from the start. Google Maps sent me to the wrong entrance, and getting through the gate required an access code. I called the number provided about five times with no answer, then waited outside for an hour. They first showed me a dodgy-looking room; after I asked why the company had paid R 1750 for it, I was taken to another room with a "King size" bed. The building had lots of old furniture that looked like second-hand office furniture, and the carpet was dirty. The "Coffee station" was a crooked bookcase with Ricoffy and powdered milk. Getting suitcases up and down the steep stairs was a nightmare.

The only good part was being in a pretty, secure estate. The place smelled strongly of repeatedly cooked curry or something, and the room smelled as if people had smoked in it a lot. They charge four-star rates, but I didn't think it was worth it. Breakfast was a joke, with hardly any variety. The bacon was tough as leather, and even the fried eggs tasted bad and smelled off. I usually eat anything, but couldn't stomach it. Don't waste your money here.

Getting access to the estate was a problem, and nobody answered the phone when I arrived. It felt very unprofessional: no one responded to the doorbell, and eventually someone came who didn't seem to know the booking or explain it clearly. Very badly managed.

The staff were very friendly, and Sunday's breakfast filled us up. We stayed one night, and the room and bathroom were neat. There were two of us, but towels, water, and the other supplies seemed to be set out for just one person. The duvet cover had tears, though we could live with that. Also, the rooms share a veranda, so privacy is limited.