The Green Man Boutique Hotel

The bed felt like a sheet of plywood, and the bathroom was unpleasant too. There were stains on the sheets, and the bed was crawling with bedbugs. I can't understand why anyone should have to bend down just to get into the room. Worst stay ever, completely unacceptable.

We only needed somewhere for one night, but left as soon as we saw the place and went to the Stansted Holiday Inn instead. It cost only a little more and felt infinitely safer and cleaner. This place is filthy and derelict, with no reception, staff or communication. They send a room code, but the building can be entered by anyone through the fire escape, which stays open. It feels like an abandoned horror house, and we thought sleeping on a bench outside Stansted might actually be safer. There were rats too. Calling it a hotel feels like a scam. Don't waste your money here. It looked like Buffalo Bill might jump out from around a corner and yell, "It puts the lotion on or it gets the hose".

Getting to the rooms means using an outdoor metal staircase with poor lighting, and there’s no outside lighting either, so we drove past the place on the way back. The bar is always closed, with no food or drinks available, though there’s a pub and chippy about three minutes away by car. In the room, one sink had no spout and the other barely trickled. We only got one teabag and no coffee. At first glance the room seemed OK, with a big brass bedstead and soft mattress. Wouldn’t recommend it.

The location was good, and that’s about all I can say for it. This isn’t a boutique hotel, or really a hotel at all. The room was filthy, and the bedding looked as if someone had just climbed out and quickly pulled it straight for the next guest. The cups hadn’t been washed, though there were teabags and sugar. Bags of rubbish were piled outside beneath the fire escape, a health hazard and an obvious fire risk. DO NOT STAY HERE. You’ve been warned.