The Hotel Ml

Terri suggested the Governor's Suite for our wedding, and it turned out to be just right for the after-party. It was connected to the Bride and Groom's room, and they even kept the bar open an extra hour so everyone could get back from the venue. I had a complicated payment setup, with me covering the wedding party's rooms and the guests paying for their own. Terri helped me organize it, and Lea at the front desk made sure it all worked smoothly. It was a great experience using Grand Resort for the wedding party and guests.

The staff's treatment of me was the worst part of a terrible stay. The front desk repeatedly demanded my ID when I entered the hotel, even interrupting a phone call while I was going to my room for a charger. I asked Lisa whether they had enough trouble with homeless people entering that they had to hassle guests. She said I looked homeless. I was dressed for 15 degree weather and a big meeting with the Air Force, and her remark was rude and shocking. Later, when I headed to the elevator, she asked to ride with me. I said, "sure as long as you don't speak to me," and she got in my face, repeating, "Hello hello how are you hello" like a child. If she'd been a man, I would have felt threatened and defended myself. Another time, when I raised the TV problem at the desk, a woman told me to "keep it moving," as if there were a line, though I saw only one other guest in the lobby during my three days there. Getting into the room was awkward from the start. My assistant had booked a suite online, but at check-in the clerk said I wasn't supposed to be able to book it and that management had to book it. I stood there for two minutes unsure whether I had a room or had to go elsewhere. Ten minutes after the national championship game began, I found the cable lineup didn't include ESPN. I tried YouTube TV, but the TV froze for ten minutes, rebooted for another ten, then said it was out of storage. It took half an hour to log in. The room itself was poorly laid out. This was one of the nicest suites in the building, yet it had only partly used toilet paper rolls, one 50% full and one 25% full, with the ends folded into triangles. The bathroom and bedroom were tiny, while the suite area was oversized and wasted space. There was a lime green vinyl couch I didn't want to sit on and a wobbly two-chair table that barely felt sturdy enough for a laptop. There were no amenities, not even a restaurant or bar, and fewer than ten cars in the lot. I also went out back to see the frozen pool and snow covered grounds, but there was no keycard reader at the back entrance. No one answered the intercom, so I had to walk all the way around to the front in 15 degree weather. No one was at the desk then, which was the only time I wasn't stopped for my ID. If it hadn't been 15 degrees and my work schedule so tight, I'd have left. I've stayed at some of the nicest resorts in the world and never been asked for ID like that. Hands down the worst hotel stay I've had, with the rudest staff I've encountered. The only grand thing here is their delusion and rudeness. Without new staff and better furniture, this place will run itself into the ground. I have a photo showing how I was dressed when I was told I looked like a bum.

The lobby and hotel look nice, but there was no cable in the room, which seems like a basic amenity to me. They act like having a smart TV makes up for it, but that doesn't help if you don't have your own streaming accounts. The room was set to 81 degrees, and we were told the whole hotel was set that way for winter and they couldn't adjust it. I had to prop the door open to keep from sweating. It feels like they dressed up an ordinary hotel to look fancy when it isn't.

Coco Keys was a cool idea at one time, with an indoor water park, arcade, rooms, snack bar, and birthday parties. It's right off the 295 highway, too. Such a shame that it wasn't kept clean. People quickly lost interest in swimming in urine filled lazy rivers with hair extensions floating around. It wasn't somewhere you wanted to walk barefoot.